WHAT'S IN A NAME? QUITE A BIT ACTUALLY...
9TH APRIL 2021
The story about actress Thandie Newton reclaiming the spelling of her name caught my attention this week. She has decided to revert back to the Zulu spelling of her name, which is Thandiwe Newton after the ‘w’ was carelessly dropped from her name in her very first acting credits. Sloppy error…sadly not uncommon when your name isn’t Bob.
It caught my eye because it reminded me of many people I knew. My auntie who was known at work as ‘Ann’ (her name was Bhanu), my father who’s actual name ‘Navinchandra’ was shortened to Navin and even then, he was mistakenly called ‘Gavin’ many times (and used to shrug it off) or friends who’ve taken on abbreviations of their name because ‘it’s just easier’ – remember the skit on Goodness Gracious Me where we met the ‘Coopers’ (Kapoors), this is real life people.
Which got me thinking…had I played into this simplification of traditional naming conventions, (albeit unwittingly) when I landed on the names for my two children? Both of my children have two names – a ‘western’ name as I used to refer to it (cringe), and an Indian name. I have Ella Avni, my little girl and Ethan Anand, my little boy. Looking back, the rationale at the time was well-intended, it was to give them ‘choice’ when they were older but at the same time, ensure they knew their ethnic origin. Plus when the older generation asked what my kids are called, I always preferred being able to say their Indian name…it was a weird respect thing.
I take this two-name thing very seriously. I’m always careful to buy anything personalised in both of these names so they became accustomed to both – except when you’re in Clinton Cards and the water bottles only come in Ella or Ethan. It’s so that they learn to appreciate and respond to both. Which is just as well as they have two sets of grandparents who refer to them by different names!
But that’s absolutely fine, it’s why they were given two names in the first place. To offer choice. But by doing that, did I actually score an own goal when it comes to self-identity? Why couldn’t she just have been called Avni? Why couldn’t he just have been called Anand? As someone who grew up in an Indian household surrounded by brothers who all adopted the traditional ‘esh’ Gujarati boys names (everyone knows a Pritesh, Dipesh, Dharmesh right!?), the girls in our house went the other way and went for very western names – myself included, I never ever came across another Indian girl called Alicia growing up! And no middle name in sight…
Today, I love the fact that my name can keep people guessing about my origins. When people ask me ‘where are you from’, a question I always have to clarify…I say…
“What, do you mean ‘from’ or ‘from, from?”
There have been many occasions where they’ve guessed wrong! So, what’s in a name? Quite a bit actually…and it’s great to see high profile celebs like Thandiwe reclaim what is rightfully theirs. We saw this earlier in the year with BBC presenter Ben Bland, who has changed his name to Boulos to celebrate his heritage. His mother’s side of the family is Sudanese-Egyptian and he grew up speaking fluent Arabic alongside English, even though he was born in the UK.
I know so many people who have shortened their names, often on their own accord, but I make a point of asking them whether they prefer to be called their full name to acknowledge they have one, no matter how difficult it might be to pronounce. There is nothing more personal than your name. Respect it. Respect its origins. If you decide to alter it, always do it on your terms, not because it makes someone else’s life easier.